Crawl Out Through the Fallout (Novelty Song) Sheldon Allman (1960)

Crawl Out Through the Fallout (Novelty Song) Sheldon Allman (1960)

"The Regulators just used to be lawgivers, just that. Now they've got a whole fucking army!"
―Rapid Valley resident about the Dakota Regulators' current situation
Dakota Regulators
Dakota Regulators Symbol
Political Information
Group type:Vigilante/Military group
Leader Title:General
Leader:Paula Hopper
Societal Information
Location(s):Rapid City, South Dakota
Historical Information
Policy Information
Goals:To protect Rapid Valley and restore order to the Badlands Territory
Allies:American Northern Army, Rockers, Rapid City Regulators (varies), the Superiority (varies), various Rapid City raider gangs, Badlands Bulk Arms
Enemies:Custer's American Army, the Superiority (varies), various Rapid City raider gangs

The Dakota Regulators are the protectors of the settlement of Rapid Valley, lawbringers of the wasteland, and a significant part of the American Northern Army. Their existence has always been hard and current times are no different. Although they portray themselves as the ever moral protectors of civilization, the Regulators will go very far to protect their people, perhaps too far.



The Dakota Regulators' origins go back to the founding of the place they protect, Rapid Valley. A scavenger town, Rapid Valley rose from the ashes of Rapid City in 2107. The plentiful scrap and appliances of the ruined city went through either Rapid Valley or the bigger settlement of Coolidge.

This prosperity brought raiders with hungry eyes and cold eyes who wanted to snatch all that away from the scavengers. Coolidge was the first to fall victim to the raiders and was destroyed in 2121. Rapid Valley saw this and fortified. This helped them survive many withering raider attacks in later years. These raider attacks would continue on for the rest of the town's existence. Raiders would occasionally break through Rapid Valley's defenses and sack the town. The town would have to have some organized militia or military to do any more than survive.

This finally came in 2184 when a group of concerned citizens came together and decided to create an official force to police and protect Rapid Valley. One of them, Timothy, originally from a town on the West Coast, suggested some of the basic tenets of the group and its name, the Dakota Regulators. The people decided to agree with this, and the Dakota Regulators were formed. They were the shiny white knights of the wasteland, ready to enforce the law and protect the innocent. To denote their good intentions, the Regulators wore all white and used a dove as their symbol.

In the early years, the Dakota Regulators' were a loose group of vigilantes led by a commander and some sergeants commanding two platoons. Timothy, though inexperienced, served as the first commander. In the 2180s and 2190s, they managed to destroy any raider influences and organized crime in Rapid Valley while combating some raider gangs outside as well, mostly The Yen Boys and 8s.

After managing to consolidate in Rapid Valley, the Dakota Regulators grew stronger and focused even more on fighting raiders. They were becoming a power in Rapid City. Their zenith came in late 2208 when the promising Sergeant Tag Nuelson led a full platoon to wipe out the 8s and claim their base. Falling upon the 8s' stronghold, Nuelson and his platoon destroyed the 8s and held the stronghold on their own. The Commander at the time, Terrance Kelly, approved of this but was convinced by another Sergeant, Jag, to hold off reinforcements in fear of a retaliatory attack on Rapid Valley.

In the spring of 2208, a retaliatory attack did come but on Nuelson's stronghold. Sergeant Nuelson and his entire platoon was wiped out by a large coalition of raiders, and his stronghold was renamed Honor's Cost as a cruel joke.

The Regulators were in shock from losing Nuelson and an entire platoon. They could not stage a counterattack or even retrieve Nuelson's body, which was being paraded around by the Rust Bones. All they could do was hunker down, fortify, and hope they could soon build up enough strength to take revenge.

Building up their strength proved to be not enough. The Superiority had seen the Regulators' weakness at Honor's Cost and decided to take advantage of that. After some build up of their own, the Superiority attacked Rapid Valley in 2211, intending to sack it.

The fight was a hard one but one that the Dakota Regulators lost. The Superiority viciously sacked Rapid Valley and killed half of the Regulators in battle, including Commander Kelly. Jag managed to retreat with much of the rest and returned to Rapid Valley two days later. What he found was a town burned and bloodied with a single Black Flag hanging on its flagpole.


The recovery from the sack was slow, as the Superiority raided them again later that year and other raiders tried as well. Jag, now the Regulators' commander, was a strong leader and managed to fight off raiders. The Regulators did not even try to fight the Superiority again and instead paid them off with the help of Rapid Valley's government. The Regulators were rather low-key for the next forty years, protecting Rapid Valley and fending off raiders, trying not to pick a fight again. It was during that time that their hatred of mutants was solidified.

Things changed in the 2250s. Slavers from the outside were coming in and taking captives from wastelanders in Rapid City, sometimes near Rapid Valley. The Dakota Regulators could not tolerate this perceived slight and attacked the slavers soon after they arrived, even burning one of their camps. This made many in Rapid City happy but brought the ire of General Custer who had hired the slavers to help build Fort Rushmore. Soon enough, Custer's American Army was moving into Rapid City and clashing with the Regulators on a regular basis.

The situation changed in 2258. Custer's forces and many of their slavers abruptly withdrew from the city, which uneased the Regulators. Their unease proved not to be unwarranted. Raider camps were overrun, and gangs uprooted. This turned out to be the work of chem-addled vault dwellers from Vault 52, who the Regulators mocked as "newbies". They would no doubt smash these vault dwellers in battle.

The vault dwellers proved more resilient than expected, and they took many Regulators with them. Their assaults on Rapid Valley, in particular, were very bloody. The Regulators were on the defensive to hold them off but managed to turn the tables on the vault dwellers by the winter of 2258. This was capped off when the Regulators demolished the entrance of Vault 52, cutting off any return.

The stop of the vault dwellers' rampage proved to be what brought the Regulators back into relevance and conflict as well. Almost immediately after the fight ended with the vault dwellers, the Regulators began to fight Custer's American Army and raiders again like old times. This was fine for them at first, as the Regulators had much more stable footing as they had weathered the vault dwellers' attacks better.

This did not last for long, however. Custer's American Army managed to get back on its feet by 2259. This war combined with raider attacks took a great toll on the Regulators and Rapid Valley. This situation could not go on forever.

The Regulators' commander, Henry Isaacs, decided he wanted to negotiate a truce with Custer. This resulted in a coup in 2260, and Isaacs was replaced. This did little to help the Regulators and only caused more problems.

The turmoil in the Dakota Regulators worried much of the leadership, including its new commander Gregson and the platoon sergeants. They would not stop fighting Custer, but they also could not continue the war without outside help. They first attempted to contact with some of the raiders in Rapid City to ask for help. No one would help them due to understandable past animosities. They would have to look north for help.

American Northern Army

The Regulators sent their most decorated sergeant, Johnson, north to make contact with the faraway American Northern Army, who had offered the Regulators membership in the past. Leading a small delegation, Johnson talked to the ANA only to be interrupted by RUSA representatives who also wanted to sway the ANA. This made Sergeant Johnson furious to no end.

However, the negotiations swayed back in the Regulators' favor with the help of the New-Merican Society, and they eventually triumphed while the Regulators were still clashing with Custer's American Army in Rapid City. The Dakota Regulators officially became members of the American Northern Army in 2260. Commander Gregson became General Gregson.

This complicated matters in Rapid City. Regulator and RUSA forces ceased their war for the moment, not wanting to provoke the other too much anymore. This led to a certain type of peace in Rapid City, with the exception of smaller raider conflicts.

The Regulators and Rapid Valley, in general, were exhausted from the war and mostly hunkered down again, hoping to build up their strength again. This was assisted by Badlands Bulk Arms with new weapons. This time was different though.

The American Northern Army, specifically the New-Merican Society, were initially disappointed when they saw how weak the Regulators actually were. Not able to back out now, the ANA sent a team of specialists south to help train the Regulators and assist them. This team was named Renner's Raiders and was lead by the recent rising star in the ANA, Sergeant Major Tom Renner. Renner intended to train these "greenhorns" his way and was convicted to do things "the New-Merican way". This gruff style, combined with the mutants in Renner's Raiders, subsequently caused Renner to constantly clash with the Regulators' leadership, rank-in-file, and Rapid Valley locals. However, the Regulators needed Renner to survive the coming years so they tolerated him and his team to an extent.

First, Renner set about reorganizing the Regulators to them into a viable army to oppose more powerful groups such as Custer's American Army and the Superiority in 2262. This involved more lax rules on training, recruiting, and more archaic "moral requirements". General Gregson and Sergeant Beau Neil grudgingly supported Renner in these measures while Sergeant Johnson vehemently opposed it, saying it betrayed the Regulators' founding principles. This controversy continued on for a while.

Renner's tactics did work, for better or for worst. Raiders and remnants of the vault dwellers were forced away from Rapid Valley, and in 2265 the Superiority even agreed to stop fighting the Regulators completely and stop raiding their caravans. This seemed a success to many in Rapid Valley, but it was only accomplished through carefully placed bribes made indirectly by Renner to Uthern, the Superiority's leader.

Many in Rapid Valley and the Regulators approved of these new agreements, but others such as Sergeant Johnson were suspicious and investigated. After a bit of snooping, Sergeant Johnson discovered Renner's bribery, which drove him over the edge.

Intending to expose Renner and hopefully separate from the Regulators from the ANA once and for all, Sergeant Johnson went to his superior General Gregson with his evidence. Sergeant Johnson was shocked to discover that Gregson already knew about the bribery and had approved of it, "for the good of everyone". Sergeant Johnson was horrified by this betrayal of the Regulators' "founding principles" and declared that the rest of Rapid Valley should know, "for the good of everyone". Gregson then proceeded to arrest Johnson under charges of treason in 2266.

After Johnson's arrest, much of the Regulators' upper echelons refused to fight in protest and Renner and Gregson were forced to work out a deal with Johnson or face a rebellion. Johnson would be allowed to leave, and his family would be safe if he stayed quiet on Renner's bribery. Reluctantly, Johnson accepted this and soon after publically announced he was going into voluntary exile into the ruins of Rapid City.

Many in the Regulators' ranks knew something was up and several volunteered to accompany Johnson into exile in protest for what they knew was an unjust punishment. General Gregson allowed Johnson and his followers to leave and eventually form the Rapid City Regulators.

From then on, the mainline Dakota Regulators kept increasing in size, bringing in another Sergeant, Mark Hayes, to replace Johnson. The Regulators even began establishing outposts and machine gun nests outside Rapid Valley to further police raiders. Tom Renner continued to assist with this. However, this did not culminate in the Dakota Regulators making a major offensive in Rapid Valley, as they were still too small to make a dent against the raider gangs and Custer, even with the occasional assistance of the Rapid City Regulators. The highlight of this period took place outside the city, when a whole platoon of Regulators, led by Mark Hayes and helped by Tom Renner, brought the notorious Wilson Gang to justice. They killed most of the outlaws and "hung the rest".

With Gregson dying of natural causes in 2272, Mark Hayes became the new General, and Paula Hopper became the new sergeant. Hayes lasted for less than two years before dying in battle against the Yen Boys, and Paula Hopper became General. Once a friend of the exiled Sergeant Johnson, Hopper's hardline stance and moralistic outlook often clashed with Renner's pragmatic actions. This was most over Hopper's disdain for the Superiority and Renner's style of lording over the Regulators and his tolerance of mutants.

This culminated when Vault 52 was occupied by Custer's American Army, with Hopper, Renner, and the ANA high command all having different opinions on how to respond to this. Hopper wanted to figure out the situation peacefully, Renner wanted to covertly snuff out the base disguised as raiders, and ANA high command wanted to pay raiders to take out the base for them.

Eventually, Renner and his team won out in the argument and with the help of the Rockers destroyed Custer's base in Vault 52 disguised as raiders in 2276. The Regulators took no part and looked on in disgust.

After that, Renner was called back north to try to further cover up his involvement in the Battle of Vault 52. General Hopper was free to run the Regulators as she saw fit and she did, having the Regulators become the moral guardians of Rapid City and fighting raiders while grudgingly maintaining loose alliances with the Superiority and the Rapid City Regulators. Hopper even managed to finally destroy the Hammer in 2278, bringing some honor back to the Regulators' names. This continued on to 2280, when war came again.

The Generals' War

In 2280, General Custer finally figured out that the ANA was involved with the Battle of Vault 52 and used that as a casus belli to attack the Regulators and Rapid Valley.

Custer's American Army first acted by assaulting all of the Regulators' positions outside Rapid Valley, hoping to wipe them out there. This succeeded due to the element of surprise and the Regulators sustained huge casualties and were forced back to Rapid Valley.

From there, RUSA forces besieged Rapid Valley and prepared to smash the Regulators once and for all. However, most of them were forced to withdraw to fight the ANA in the Borderlands. Hopper and her soldiers were still besieged by a small detachment of Custer's American Army and hired raiders, but it was too small to take Rapid Valley by force. The Regulators repulsed them at every attempt to assault Rapid Valley.

Eventually, the siege on Rapid Valley was relieved by allied raiders and ANA reinforcements (Renner's Raiders). From there, the Regulators prepared for the inevitable next siege while sending out the occasional patrol alongside Renner's Raiders to assist the raiders in fighting Custer. General Hopper absolutely loathes working with the raiders but feels it is necessary for the Regulators' survival. The rest of the Regulators feel the same and generally feel the real war in Rapid City will last forever and all they can do is survive.

However, with Renner gone and Hopper in charge, the Regulators lack any current internal conflicts and are more decisive than before. With swift action and continued resolve, there is hope for them yet in the future.


The Dakota Regulators, even after becoming an army, think of themselves as the lawgivers of the wasteland. They have strong morals and even take it to a spiritual degree, believing law-giving to be their obligation given by their Creator. This is why they wear white and use the dove as their symbol.

This morality extends to freeing slaves and fighting raiders, but it has some loopholes. The Dakota Regulators have a big anti-mutant bias due to their history of fighting mutants in the Rapid City ruins, but they sometimes overlook raider gangs with mutants who are aligned with them and the ANA. People have pointed out this hypocrisy, but the Regulators ignore this and refuse to change. These people include Renner's Raiders, which is why Paula Hopper and Tom Renner never got along.

The Dakota Regulators are generally viewed as the most elite, experienced members of the American Northern Army right next to Renner's Raiders. While this is true for a quite large group of battle-hardened veterans, this ultimately underscores the Regulators crippling manpower shortages and casualty rates. Those have been improved since Renner's assistance and reforms, but the problems remain to an extent.


Before joining the ANA, the Dakota Regulators almost exclusively relied on pre-War equipment, ranging from military fatigues, combat armor, and riot gear to crossbows and 10mm pistols. This continued on until Badlands Bulk Arms was set up in Rapid Valley and provided the Regulators with a steady supply of pipe weapons and "the Rookie", a new type of sub-machine gun.

After joining the ANA, the Dakota Regulators were provided with more weapons and supplies from the north, such as other weapons such as actual sub-machine guns and service rifles. The grunts still are forced to rely on BBA's pipe weapons and even compound bows.

Notable Individuals

General Paula Hopper

Paula Hopper

Paula Hopper is the General of the Dakota Regulators and the Army of the South. An experienced stoic woman, Hopper holds the Regulators' values very high and has clashed with the ANA in the north on several occasions, especially Tom Renner.

Daryl Radson

Daryl Radson

Daryl Radson is one of the more experienced Dakota Regulators but is not a Sergeant. Born in Rapid Valley, Radson has lived there all his life and is loyal to the end. However inside, Radson holds a lot of pain inside due to his past experiences, primarily a week where he was continually raped by a band of female raiders. This trauma is what has held him back from being promoted, even though he is a very level-headed man and old friends with General Hopper.



A new recruit, Melissa is a rising star in the Dakota Regulators' ranks. A grunt recruited from a Rapid Valley butcher's shop, Melissa was the only survivor of her squad's first incursion into Rapid City in 2283. Since then, she has become a terror to raiders and Custer's forces. She even earned the nickname "the Harpy of Honor's Cost" when she terrorized the Rust Bones in 2287. General Hopper and Melissa generally do not get along, as she disdains authority.



"The raiders have been here forever. Mutants too. Custer's different. He's been campaigning for only forty years, and we can't wait to confront him anymore."
―General Paula Hopper on the Regulators' attitude towards Custer
"We fight for a belief. A moral code."
―Melissa on the Dakota Regulators


"The Regulators will never be able to overtake Rapid City. Too small, too conflicted."
Uthern on the Dakota Regulators
"Damn pigeons are afraid to come out of their hole. Hopper's a decent General, but the woman can't barely tell her right from left from all that shellshock. What's a man to do?"
―Sergeant Major Tom Renner on helping the Dakota Regulators
"White faces, white coats, still red blood."
―Huan, Warlord of The Yen Boys
This has been written by MongoosePirate. Please contact this user before editing this article.
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