The Perks of Being Radioactive

Actual Mongoose Pirate

The only image I could find of a mongoose pirate

In this blog, MongoosePirate, a history buff with way too much time on his hands, will look over some of the more colorful content that has graced this wiki in the past ranging from impractical weapons to impractical spin-offs of canon groups. Not all of these pages were bad, but all of them were deleted for one reason or another. Let's dive in...

As many of you might know, Tranquility Lane has changed quite a lot over the years. Users go their own way, articles get deleted, and rules get changed. This edition of Tales of the Deletion Logs reflects a bygone casualty of rule changes: Fan Made Perks.

Way back when the dinosaurs roamed the Earth and OvaltinePatrol first joined the wiki, users given much more freedom in regards to what they could write whether it be ideas for ideas for new games or pieces of equipment. However, the most interesting relic of that era to me is Fan-Made Perk page. This page catalogued a large list of fan perks for gameplay created by the wiki community. These perks would often be related to factions or characters on the wiki, but some were completely unique. Here is a comprehensive list of the perks with comments attached in parentheses:

Level Perks

These perks can be obtained through leveling up. They only have positive effects, and require certain skills to take.


You are an expert on Anti-Armor combat. When fighting an opponent in Power Armor, your attacks do 25% more Damage.
Looks like a Vault Boy smashing a Power Armor helmet with a Sledgehammer.
Requires Level 28, 7 Strength, 7 Perception
(seems OP but workable)

Anything Goes

Anything you can grab in battle, you do, and you use it to deadly effect, from plungers to pencils. You can turn almost any junk item into a makeshift weapon.
Looks like a Vault Boy sticking a Plunger to a Deathclaw's face.
Requires Level 12, 7 Luck, 50 Melee Weapons
(I like this one)


You are the toughest man around, or so you think. You gain 10% Damage Resistance when wearing armor of any kind.
Looks like a Vault Boy riding in a tank, wearing Power Armor.
Requires 6 Strength
(seems pretty standard to me)


You care for your men. When a follower dies you get 20% Damage resistance, and a 15% Damage boost for half an hour (game time)
Looks like a Vault boy firing 2 10mm SMGs with another dead Vault boy over his shoulder
Requires level 10, a follower
(wouldn’t be worth the points tbh but interesting concept)

Big Damn Hero

You are a self-styled 'Hero of the Wasteland', and you always arrive just in the nick of time. When neutral characters are under attack by bad characters, you gain a 50% boost to Damage if your weapon is below 30 Damage and you have Very Good Karma.


Trenchcoats are not good karma

Looks like a Vault Boy in a trench coat, looking over two charging armies.
Requires Level 20, Very Good Karma [Or Else The Perk Will Not Work]
(yeah, I’m not sorry karma’s gone)

Bluff Master

You are a master of deceit and can talk yourself out of almost any situation. Opens up special options in conversations.
Requires Level 8, 3 Charisma
(as a roleplay supremacist, this one really activated me almonds)

Bounty Hunter

You are the human enforcer of Karma. You do 12% more Damage to Wanted characters.
Looks like a Vault Boy holding a Wanted poster that says "You're Wanted".
Requires Level 20
(not a strong enough perk and could do without the karma in my opinion)


You are extremely skilled with Big Guns and as a result you have learned how to effectively dual wield certain Big Guns [Excludes Area-of-Effect Big Guns].
Looks like a Vault Boy holding a Gatling Laser in each hand/arm.
Requires Level 30, 9 Strength, 90 Big Guns
(sounds kind of ridiculous but it is sufficiently high and sounds awesome)

Cat Eyes

Your night-vision has improved to the point that your sight is unhindered in all but total darkness.
Looks like a Vault Boy with cat ears, large luminous eyes, and whiskers.
Requires Level 22, 7 Perception, 7 Agility, 60 Sneak
(not bad, not bad at all)

Crack Shot

You have learned the weak points in your enemies armor. Your shots do 25% more Damage 30% percent of the time.
Requires Level 18, 50 Big Guns, 50 Energy Weapons, 50 Small Guns
(pretty straightforward and not bad, could be trait)

Deadeye Shot

You can expertly compensate for recoil and other inaccuracies using any weapon short of a shotgun. Small Guns with a Spread less than 3 now have 0 Spread.
Looks like a Vault Boy with X's for eyes holding a pistol.
Requires Level 16, 80 Small Guns
(just specific enough with the right level requirement)

Death From Above

Your love of explosives has been taken to a whole new level. As such, the Damage your explosives deal is increased by 25%.
Requires Level 18, Explosives 75
(not bad, like the name)

Dual Wield

You have the ability to wield and effectively use 2 one-handed weapons at the same time. However, it takes longer to reload.
Looks like a Vault Boy holding a Silenced 10mm in each hand aiming off to the left.
Requires Level 20, Gunslinger Perk, 6 Perception
(sounds ridiculous like the previous one and I can personally attest that dual wielding pistols is a terrible idea)


There is no greater way to face an opponent than in single combat. When you face off against a single human opponent, you gain +5 to Small Guns, Melee Weapons, and Unarmed, but receive a -5 penalty when facing more than four human opponents at a time.
Looks like a Vault Boy with a top hat, curly mustache, and smoking jacket holding a flintlock pistol, aiming at the viewer.
Requires Level 15, 7 Strength, 7 Perception, 7 Agility, 7 Luck
(cool idea but would be difficult to implement in-game I imagine)

Drug Dealer

You get more caps when selling Drugs and Alcohol.
Looks like a Vault Boy holding a box that says "Drugs".
Requires Level 6, Constant Chem Addiction, 40 Barter
(now this I can get behind, as long as I get more dialogue options too when selling to children)


You find more ammo for Big guns, and your Explosives and Big Guns skills are increased by 15.
Looks like a Vault Boy wielding dual Miniguns.
Requires Level 18, 85 Big Guns, 60 Explosives
(more sensible than the other dual wielding perk)


If you fail to pick a lock or hack a computer, you can punch or kick the object and have a chance to pick it or hack it anyway. However, this may be noisy enough to alert nearby enemies.
Looks like a Vault Boy dressed as The Fonz' and punching a jukebox.
Requires Level 10, 8 Luck
(unique and flavorful reference)

Final Shot

The last unit of ammo loaded into your weapon (The clip, magazine, etc.) does 30% more Damage.
Looks like a Vault Boy loading a single bullet into his shotgun.
Requires Level 22, 8 Luck
(sounds interesting but wouldn’t be very effective most of the time I imagine)

Force Negotiator

You are good at getting what you want. You gain 10 Speech and 20 Unarmed at the cost of a Charisma point.
Looks like a Vault Boy holding a little kid up to a wall.
Requires Level 20, Bad Karma, 8 Strength (sounds it could be like an actual perk, though the name could be better)

Free Runner

You have learned the free running martial art of Parkour. Your Agility and Endurance instantly rise to level 10, and your Unarmed skill increases by 20, at the cost of a point from Charisma and Luck.
Looks like a Vault Boy flipping over a car.
Requires Level 25, Neutral Karma, 5 Strength, 5 Endurance, 5 Agility
(not bad per se but Fallout really isn’t a series suited for parkour unless Fallout: Seattle comes out in the future)


When facing multiple opponents (6 or more), you will have 10 point bonus to Damage Resistance, and your Damage increases by 30.
Requires Level 26, 8 Perception, 6 Endurance
(really deserves a better name, how male deaths does it take to become a professional Genocide-ist?)

Gentleman Thief

You're the noblest of burglars - steal from the rich, give to yourself - and the poor when they need it! As long as you have good Karma, your Stealth and Speech increase by 10 points each.
Looks like a Vault Boy holding a bag marked "Swag", handing a pile of caps to a ragged-looking beggar.
'Requires Level 20, Good Karma, 50 Stealth
(interesting concept and idea for gameplay)

Go For The EYES!

You take pride in blinding your enemies. It's all fun and games until somebody loses an eye! You have a higher chance to shoot your opponents in the eyes.
Looks like a Vault Boy with a M72 Gauss Rifle shooting Frank Horrigan in the eyes.
Requires Level 28, 9 Perception, 60 Small Guns, 60 Energy Weapons, 60 Big Guns (cruel but clever)

The Great Equalizer

You have become a skilled rhetorician and marksman. Your Charisma increases by 1 and your Spread with any Small Guns rifle is 0.
Looks like a Vault Boy in a white suit and horn-rimmed glasses holding a hunting rifle.
Requires Level 24, 75 Small Guns, 60 Speech
(possibly overpowered but cool idea)

Hold Your Liquor

After consuming Alcohol, you no longer receive a deduction in Intelligence and you cannot become addicted.
Looks like a Vault Boy smiling surrounded by empty Vodka bottles.
Requires Level 10, 6 Endurance, 6 Intelligence, 60 Medicine
(I have some friends who’d like this perk)

I Have A Bad Feeling About This...

Either you're very experienced or very lucky. Either way you have a high sense of danger and can tell when something is wrong. While hostiles are near your Perception increases by 1 and your Small Guns, Big Guns, and Energy Weapons skills increase by 10%.
Looks like a Vault Boy who is sweating and a bush behind him with evil eyes looking out it.
Requires Level 25, 7 Perception
(nice reference you’ve got there)

Improvisation Expert

The Damage you deal when using custom weapons (Railway Rifle, Dart Gun, etc.) is increased by 10%.
Looks like a Vault Boy holding up a cannon made of pipe.
Requires Level 14, At Least All Level 1 Schematics (similar to a previous perk but not bad)


Your evil ways encourage allies to cause chaos. Every ally near you increases Damage dealt by 25%, but they may attract negative attention from characters with good karma.
Looks like a Vault Boy Devil with smaller versions standing around him.
Requires Evil Karma (very entertaining idea, I can see this one opening a lot of dialogue options)

Iron Stomach

It is now possible for you to eat items not normally considered food. The amount of Health Points that are restored depends on the item consumed.
Looks like a Vault Boy sitting at a table getting ready to eat some junk.
Requires Level 10, 7 Endurance, 70 Medicine
(sounds disgusting and quite interesting)

Keen Eye

Your Damage with all one-handed firearms increases by 15.
Requires Level 12, 8 Agility, 5 Luck
(so average it’s average)

Leaf on the Wind

You are strangely calm in over-the-top dangerous situations, and it shows when you're in combat. Your Agility, Perception and Intelligence increase by 3 when outnumbered by more than five.
Looks like a Vault Boy in a Hawaiian shirt, surrounded by five Vault Boy Raiders .
Requires Level 15, 6 Agility
(no you’re crying)

Level Headed

You are a calm, cool, and collected leader. Your attitude steadies the nerves of your men in stressful situations. Your automatic or semi-automatic weapon Spread is reduced by 1.0 for nearby allies during combat.
Looks like a group of Vault Boy Soldiers aiming assault rifles.
Requires Neutral Karma (if only we could get a squad together like in the early Fallouts)


Occasionally during your travels you will be approached by a liberated slave, who will offer you a couple of stimpaks.
Looks like a Vault Boy accepting something from a slave.
Requires Level 18, Good Karma (meh)


You can accurately shoot single-shot firearms one and a half times as far. Also, the last shot loaded into these weapons does double damage, and is twice as likely to cause a critical hit.
Looks like a Vault Boy holding a pistol looking into the distance.
Requires Level 24, 9 Perception (okay I guess)

Martial Artist

Training has turned your body into a formidable weapon. You know do 20% more damage with unarmed attacks.
Requires Level 28, 8 Strength, 80 Unarmed
(only if it comes with Engrish dialogue options)

Morning Star

You deal 10% extra damage. Melee weapons get a 20% bonus, and fire-based weapons get an extra 15% damage bonus added.
Looks like a Vault Boy Devil holding a Flamer and a Shiskebab.
Requires Level 20, Very Bad Karma [or else the perk will not work] (saving this for my raider warlord character)

One Shot!

You kill someone with the last bullet in your clip. Your fire rate increases 25% and bullets do 10% increased Damage.
Looks like Vault Boy holding a single bullet between his fingers
Requires Level 25, 7 Strength, 80 Big Guns (does that mean anyone because holy hell that sounds OP)


The lower your karma, the better loot you get from bodies that you have killed and, for an amount of time based on how low your karma is, you get better loot from containers after killing an enemy. Every kill adds to the clock.
Looks like a Vault Boy with an evil beard holding a gun and a sack marked "Loot".
Requires Level 10, Bad Karma (my kind of perk right here)

Quick Draw

If you make a first strike on an enemy while he is aware of your presence, your attack gets a significant damage and critical bonus.
Requires Level 29, 9 Agility, 75 Small Guns
(would have liked this in New Vegas)

Radiation Battery

You've become a Radiation Battery! Radiation now heals you and you get better stats the more you are irradiated. Note that a battery can get over charged.
Looks like Vault Boy having claps on him that connect to a barrel of Radiation.
Requires Level 28, 9 Endurance (reminds me of a perk in 4)


You are a master of science. You have learned to apply your knowledge of science to repairing your items. When repairing items, add half of your science skill to your repair skill.
Looks like Vault Boy in a lab coat yelling "SCIENCE!" like for the "THOSE!" achievement image
Requires Level 20, 8 Intelligence, 75 Science, 50 or less Repair (this seems more like a trait than a perk)

Second Chance

You have gotten used to the injuries sustained in the Wasteland. If you die there is an 50% chance of getting back up with half health. If you die again before combat ends, it's permanent this time.
Looks like a Vault Boy on the ground reaching up.
Requires Level 30, 9 Luck, 50 Medicine, Death (requires Death lol)


You get more caps selling stuff even if your bartering skills are low.
Looks like a shady Vault Boy holding up some junk marked "1000 caps".
Requires Level 18, 80 Speech (shady Merchant build, here I come)

Stand Your Ground!

Your will to fight, even in the face of utter defeat, inspires everyone around you. Every ally character nearby gains a 10 point boost to damage resistance during combat.
Looks like a bloodied Vault Boy Soldier standing amidst a hail of bullets.
Requires Good Karma (maybe if you like companions this is good)

Quill Skin

If an enemy does a melee attack or unarmed on you, you inflict a quarter of the damage you took onto them.
Looks like a Vault Boy covered with sharp quills.
Requires Level 29, 9 Endurance, 30 Medicine, 70 Melee Weapons
(sounds like a bad STD)

Ten-Million-Billion to One

You are a master of the Ten-Million-Billion to One Shot. Any shots made in VATS with less than 15% to hit now hit automatically.

Looks like a Vault Boy firing a pistol, upside down, backwards with his head in a bucket. hitting another Vault Boy in the eye.

Requires Level 30, 9 Luck, 100 Small Guns (sounds like a game breaker to me but it is hard to get)

Tricky Dicky

You are a charismatic speaker. You seem to be able to lie your way out of anything, however when you get caught people seem angrier.... As such, your speech is increased, but people take longer to forgive you for things you have done in the past.
Looks like a Vault Boy with a Richard Nixon doll and mask.
Requires 7 Charisma, 80 Speech. (this is why Hobbes was right)

Watching Your Back

You and your follower have better DR when you are both fighting together. Effects increase with more followers.
Requires Level 29, 9 Charisma, A Follower
(fair perk)

Who Doesn't Love Man-Eating Maggots?

You love insects so much, most love you back! 90% of the time an insect will not attack you unless provoked. Terrorantulas are not effected by this perk.

Looks like a giant centipede coming out of the ground with a large round mouth oozing saliva and ringed with sharp teeth that is bitting down on Vault-Boy's head, stopping at Vault-Boy's mouth, which is smiling. Vault-Boy is also patting the creature's back.

Requires Level 16 (that’s an unpleasantly detailed image)

How Does This Thing Work Again?

You have no idea how any of the weapons you are using work. You get +2 to Luck if energy weapons, big guns, or small guns skill is under 25.

Looks like the Vault Boy holding a pistol by the end of the grip with a confused look on his face

Requires Level 5
(a lot of luck-based perks here)


Your exposure to mutation isn't visible by day, but at night you become a giant, murderous brute. At night, your strength rises by 2 points and your big guns increases by 30. You also regenerate health when exposed to radiation. Radiation sickness still applies.

Looks like an overgrown, bald Vault Boy with a Minigun

Requires level 20 and Bad Karma
(would be hell to implement but this would be so fun to play as imo)

Mission Perks

Mission Perks can be obtained by joining a group or completing an objective.

Aquaculture Booster Shot

The people of Aquaculture routinely deal with poisonous marine life, so SPECTRUM's Science and Medicine departments put their heads together to come up with a preventive treatment to cut down on poison related illness and fatalities. The Aquaculture Booster Shot provides a permanent +50% poison resistance, including the limb-damaging effects of Dart Guns.
Looks like a Vault Boy cheerfully chugging from a bottle marked with a skull-and-bones.
Requires treatment from SPECTRUM's Medicine department.
(the only one that still makes sense)


You are a member of the Enforcers. You are 20% more resistant to damage and your limbs take 30% longer to cripple.
Looks like a Vault Boy in MR-6 Power Armor.
Requires Enforcers Membership
(creative name, huh)

El Gigante (The Giant)

Members of the Los Gigantes Mercenary Company have gained extensive survival training and are expert scavengers & combatants, able to go toe-to-toe with some of the toughest people. LGMC mercs are also highly skilled in the use of conventional weapons. A character with the El Gigante perk gains +5 to Small Guns, Explosives, and Medicin as well as a +10% boost to damage resistance. 

Looks like a Vault Boy wearing LGMC Combat Armor.

Requires Los Gigantes membership
(sounds like the guys I need to shoot so I can steal/sell their equipment)

I'm No Hero

You were there, and you knew what to do. Why do people suddenly think the sun shines out of your ass? In spite of what you say, people call you their hero. Friendlies get skill boosts in your tag skill when within a set distance of you. People will also react better to you in conversation, and strangers are more likely to join your side in a fight and more likely to ignore a fight you started.
Looks like a Vault Boy standing between a Deathclaw and a group of Wastelanders. The Vault Boy is shooting the Deathclaw in the head.
Requires That You Have Performed Heroic Acts With Karma Other Than Good or Very Good
(spits on Karma’s grave)

Jack Rabbit

Members of Jack Rabbit Express are some of the most well traveled people in the American Wastelands and are fairly well regarded by most people. They like to share stories and tips amongst themselves and have a way of eking out better prices from merchants, all the better to outfit their next expedition! A character with the Jack Rabbit perk get +5 to Barter, Explosives, and Lockpick.
Looks like a Vault Boy wearing a Jack Rabbit Express patch.
Requires Jack Rabbit Express membership.   
(sounds useful actually)

Johnny Rocketeer

The Johnny Rockets of Los Gigantes Mercenary Company's heavy weapons group are some of the deadliest men & women of the wastes. Highly skilled in the use of all Big Guns, the Johnny Rockets are a force to be reckoned with. A charcter with the Johnny Rocketeer perk gains +10 to the Big Guns, Repair, and Explosives.

Looks like a Vault Boy with a grenade and a Missile Launcher wearing a Bandana and LGMC Combat Armor.

Requires Johnny Rockets Battle Group Membership (LGMC Battle Group).
(rather be a Johnny Guitar)

Raider Connection

Raiders tend to recognize you as one of their own, thus they will usually ignore you, unless you provoke them.
Requires a Raider Follower
(Bethesda would never greenlight this perk)

Touch of the Sand Hills

For better or worse, you have received a blessing from the Two Gods. You ignore the penalties associated with crippled limbs and enjoy a 25% increase to fire resistance while under the effects of Buffout or Psycho.
Looks like a Vault Boy with a feminine hand touching either shoulder.
Requires Sand Hills Tribe Membership (man’s worse enemy: androgyny)

Animal Tamer

You've learned from your knowlege to tame creatures and use them as comrades. Your Damage Resistnce with Animals is increased by 40%.

Looks like Vault Boy with an army of Creatures

Requires Taming 5 different Creatures with Milda Smith's Handbooks.
(pretty much an OP Animal Friend)


Traits are used in Fallout 1 and 2. They can be taken at character creation, and are different from perks due to the face that they have both negative and positive effects.


You are terrified of Terrorantulas! When you go near one, your Agility increases by 3 and you Strength increases by 1, but your Intelligence decreases by 1, your Endurance decreases by 2, and your Luck decreases by 1.

Looks like a Vault Boy with many small Terrorantulas crawling all over him so that you can only see his terrified eyes peering out from the mass of spiders.
(convoluted but interesting concept)


You are no hero. In fact, you are someone who would rather live as a loser than die a hero. You gain a bonus to your armor equal to half its base value but your chance to hit with all weapons is halved.

Looks like a Vault Boy running from a kitten.
(I would definitely want to do at least one coward playthrough)

Ice Cold

A made-in-the-mold-killer, you are beyond cool and calculated; nothing fazes you. Steady of hand and cold of heart, people just don't understand you. However, being much calmer than others in stressful situations more than makes up for that.

You reload weapons faster and your Critical Hit chance is raised significantly. However, your Charisma is reduced to 1 and Speech tests are more difficult.

Looks like a Vault Boy whistling while he reloads a Desert Eagle.
(seems potentially quite entertaining, if you’re into psychopaths)

Rock Skin

Your skin has become as strong as rock. Your damage resistance is doubled at the cost of -40% Sneak.
(I mean... you have rock skin, there’s not much to add)

Overall, I’d say the perks found on this page were of higher quality than most of the other content I’ve seen from the Deletion Logs. Whether that’s because their related to gameplay or they’re just better, I don’t know. Anyways, as you may already know, this page was deleted along with many of the others in the wake of Fallout: New Vegas. I’m actually kind of sad to see that fan-made perks and traits have been left on the wayside in recent years since they seem pretty interesting, but I can see that they might lead down a path I might not want to go down.

Next time, we examine some monster girls, God help us...